No, I do not want to take that test!

All my bags were packed and we were ready to go. I had two suit cases packed and gigantic box of tampons tucked inside. My period was coming I just new it and it was going to hit while my husband and I were on vacation. Not exactly how you want to spend you vaca with the hubby. However, we were on our way to Arizona and I was going home. As were sitting at the airport I’m calculating in my head how long it has been since my last, not so nice friend reared her ugly head. No, I’m not late I’m just stressed about this trip. I’m not a good flyer and once we land, I’m sure that damn thing is just around the corner.

Let me back track for just a minute. My husband and I had been trying for months to get pregnant. I had had a miscarriage the year before that devastated me. I wanted so badly to look into the eyes of a beautiful baby and know that it was mine, and my husband and I created it. I wanted to be a mom. But enough of that story this is a happy story and we have left what has happened in the past.

 

So here I am in AZ and still no bloody show, damn why is this just dragging on like this. I’m never like this. Oh yea, I can explain I’m on vacation and I’m stressed to the max. Slowly I start to notice my tampons are dwindling, well I know I am not using them so where the hell are they going. Yep that little shit sister of mine has been snooping in my suitcase again. Oh well if she needs em then use em, just make sure I have at least one to get me to the store. And over the next few days I watch all of them disappear , I don’t say a peep to anyone because I don’t think that I‘m pregnant, looking back I think I can say I was in denial. I can’t help but think that if this damn monster shows after all I’m going to have to use a big ass roll of TP shoved in my undies just to get to the store, and hope that I don’t lose it out the side of my pant leg onto the floor. Well I guess you can say I never had to worry about that.

 

The days of my vacation were quickly passing and the hubs and I were due to spend a night out on the town with my bestie, Billie and her other half Curt. So out to dinner we go to one of my favorite restaurants. Margaritas and Mexican food were delivered. But for some reason the margarita didn’t taste very good and all I had been able to think about that day was how damn good that cold icy beverage was going to taste. Yeah no go on that one. And why do I have an upset stomach? Oh, it’s just the heat. Yep it’s the heat. It’s making me not want to eat and upsetting my stomach. So from dinner we were on to dancing, and I’m still not feeling very well. Do I want a drink? NO if I drink anything, I’m going to be sick. This is not good, am I coming down with the flu? NO no I keep reminding myself , it’s the heat, I haven’t been home in a while and well the inside of an oven never really felt very good. From here, we’re off to the good ole strip club; the girls were taking the men out now. Two strip clubs later and a few dollars down, I begin to notice the most erotic, yes erotic, smell coming off of my husband. Now by no means was this something that had been smeared, wiped, or rubbed on my man by one of those pole dancers. It was the most wonderful sexy smell I had ever smelt before. I couldn’t get enough of it, I wanted to crawl under his chin and camp there. The rest of our vacation went on still with no show of the red dawn and it didn’t matter if my husband had come out of the shower or had been outside all day he smelled wonderful!

 

Now we’re heading home and my husband asks, “Is flow late?” I quickly reply with something along the lines, as I don’t know lets not talk about it. I am terrified to take a pregnancy test, I want so badly to see that little pink plus sign but I am scared. My husband just sits back and laughs. “Your pregnant, I know it!” No, No I’m just late I respond back. Now that we are home, I’m sure that my body is going to kick into gear and shed that liner. It’s late and I’m exhausted, I’ve got to work tomorrow. No more thinking lets just shut it down.

 

Hmmm, I’m not feeling so hot the next day. Full day of work and Billie said something about Curt having a stomach bug. I so have the stomach bug, that’s what I’ve convinced myself. I manage to make it through the day and I’m on my way home. Oh God, I’m going to lose my lunch. I cannot pull over and I have nothing in my truck to use as a catchall. I’m almost home, I can do this, keep it together, and most important breath.

 

I wipe into my parking spot and run full out sprint up my 13 steps. I burst through the door bypassing the hubs and the glad to see you smooch, to bury my head in the bowl of the toilet and release my inner exorcist. I get up to see my husband standing in the door with a smile on his face. “You’re pregnant!” Shut up, I have the stomach flu I fire right back at him. He just stands there laughing, telling me that I need to go get a pregnancy test. I refuse to do it, I don’t want to pee on a stick, and I’m not wasting good money on a stupid pregnancy test that is going to show a little pink negative sign. So off to the store goes my husband, already beaming like a proud papa. I lay down on the sofa feet propped over the side. I’m scared, nervous, and anxious. He is going to make me take the test. A million things are running through my head and I’m trying to out run the images flashing before me. I close my eyes still reeling from the taste in my mouth that I cannot get rid of. I hear the door open and voice from the kitchen, honey I’m home and I brought you something.

 

The tears begin for form as he hands me a small bag from the drug store. I protest one more time, “Really, your going to make me do this?” I knew I had lost this battle. I grabbed the box and we headed for the bathroom.

I take my time reading the instructions, making sure that I knew exactly how this worked. I do my business and hand the test over to the man. Carefully he places it on the counter and we set the kitchen timer for 3minutes. We sit on the couch staring off into nothing. Things were about to change and I new they were, I was just in denial. Then the timer goes off, my husband races for the bathroom where we had left the test.

 

I can see in his eyes exactly what the results were. I quickly snatch it away from him in disbelief. Right before my eyes is what I have been dying to see for so many months. My prayers had been answered. We were going to be parents.

Our baby girl was a planned pregnancy, I was 25 and my husband was 30. We were ready, at least we thought we were, but in life no one is every really prepared for parenthood. But the moment they place your baby in your arms there isn’t anything you can’t overcome and there isn’t anything you wouldn’t do for your child. It’s a crazy rollercoaster with its ups and downs but it’s the best rollercoaster of life that never ends.