Monday, September 10, 2012

Take a bite out of crime

Across the street from us used to live my daughters best friend Anna. Well due to a course of events mom and her girls have moved away but her dad is still my neighbor. He has never once said hi or even boo in our direction. On certain days Anna is visiting and always ends up at my house. The other night this was exactly what happened.

My daughter Bella, son Nate, and Anna are all playing outside. My husband, Nathan, had filled the pool up so they Across the street from us used to live my daughters best friend Anna. Well due to a course of events could play Barbie’s in it and he was washing one of our cars. Nathan had just finished up and was putting away the soap and bucket. All of a sudden we hear a scream and see my daughter running through the front door. "Nate bit Anna!" Now the thing about this is Nate loves Anna, she's his little crush; she brings him rocks and flowers over all the time, so this is very abnormal for my son to do something like this to Anna. Now mom, dad, and sister, yes we've all suffered the wrath of a bite from him but he's never bit anyone else ever. Anna comes running in and she's crying holding her arm. I ask to see it and sure enough my son bit the shit out of her. Full mouth of teeth wide open. I immediately grab the ice and get an ice pack going. I'm freaking out my son just bit someone and he didn't just bite he almost drew blood! It looked as if he was trying to take a chunk out of her arm.

Now I've got to bit the bullet and walk Anna home and explain this huge bite mark on her arm to her dad, mom is not there. Oh shit what's mom going to say? I don't want to do this but as a parent we've all got to buck up once and a while and take care of business. So I grab Anna’s hand and walk her across the street. My daughter is tagging along as moral support, she's telling Anna don't worry I'll bite my brother back really hard for you. "Um no Bella that’s a no a, no one is going to bite anyone!"

I knock on the door and wait, my heart is racing. I've never had one of my kids hurt someone else before and I'm am not ok with biting at all. Dad comes to the door and I explain everything, show him the bite mark and explain this is going to leave a mark and I am so sorry. I see his face kind of glaze over and I know he's thinking what the hell am I going to tell her mom. He thanks me for coming over and leaves it at that. But I'm still worried about mom. I have had my daughter bit like this before, once in the face, and I was livid! So I'm expecting a knock on my door once mom comes to pick her up. GREAT!

I come back home to find my son crying in his room where he's been sent by dad. Nathan explains to me that Anna was hitting Nate with a stick that’s why he bit her. He says I didn't spank him I just sent him to his room until dinner. Now for my son he took this as he was not getting dinner and that was almost as harsh a punishment as a spanking would have been. My husband and I are debating back and forth the getting hit with a stick and biting for it. Hands down I say biting is a No No and you should never bite anyone, but my husband seen it as he got hit with a stick and he defended himself.

I glance out the window and see mom pulling in to pick up her girls. I quickly rush out the door. I felt the need to catch her before she came banging on my door. I explain everything all over again, the bite, the ice pack, talking to dad, it’s bad and I am so sorry. She thanked me very much for letting her know, told me they would watch it, and that kids do things like this. I'm pretty sure she was still pretty pissed, she hadn't seen the bite yet but she left it at that. And the thing is kids do things like this but it still doesn't take away the fact that my son left a mark on her that I'm pretty sure it not going anywhere for a while. He hurt her, stick hitting or not and I am not ok with that at all.

How would you have handled this situation? What is an acceptable punishment for biting?

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